The Weaver of Dreams.....and the first nightmare.

(This is a post dedicated to my new character in werewolf. This about his first change, and after going over his rite of passage with my GM, I will post that here as well.)



I always knew I was different......not like them.....but it always seemed that a part of me wanted so much to belong. I only ever found solace in my books and the studies to which i devoted myself.....at least until she came along......



Her name was Alexandria Montrose, and she was the single most beautiful creature i had ever lain eyes upon. But, that was not all.....she was intelligent, charming, spirited and loving....sharing my thirst for knowledge and also my interest in the supernatural. We met our Junior year of high school, and we hit it off almost immediately. Over the last two years of High School, we started dating and became closer than ever, never seeming to leave each others side.....but something within me seemed.....alien....different. It was not that I was unhappy, but I did become jealous of other guys that spoke to her....and it was a new experience for me, though she and I talked of it. She would laugh and say that I had been walled behind my books for so long that i had merely missed out on many things....jealousy included. It's funny.....she always knew what to say to me, and I always knew that no matter what, she would be there......



After High School, we put of going to college, wanting to enjoy some time away from studying and all of the stress that comes with it, just being content with spending time together. I eventually got the itch to go back to school a year later....having a strong desire to start my education as a paramedic. I found a nice little community college to attend and enrolled in their Paramedic program. Alex was surprised at my choice in study, but she applauded my conviction. Medicine is a great field to get into, but she asked why i would choose to pursue such a career.....



I could not answer....all I knew was that the idea of helping people just seemed right. If I could save just one person's life, it would all be worth it to me. One night, I had to attend my field clinicals, pairing with aliscensed paramedic to operate in the field and get a taste of what my schooling would lead to.....which left Alex alone at home. She would always wait up for me to return home when I was out at my night classes....but this night, when i returned, there were no lights on in the house....and the front door was ajar.....so, carefully and cautiously, I made my way to the door and slipped inside, my heart racing and my thoughts churning. They could still be here....if something had happened to her, I would not be able to continue on. I stalked through the house like a predator, searching for any signs of what could have happened, and I noticed the signs of a struggle all throughout the house. I heard the distinct sound of running water coming from the bathroom, and the smell of blood was unmistakable, making my fear and anger override my need for caution, leaving me scrambling through the house now.....and suddenly, my world was crushed.

There, in a bruised, bloody heap, was Alexandria, in the floor of the bathroom........her breath coming out in short, ragged wheezes. I rushed to her side, pulling her gently into my arms as I sat with my back against the bath tub which was still running and overflowing onto the floor where it mixed with her blood, creating a pinkish pool of liquid, but it did not concern me now.....

"Alex......you're going to be ok....I'm here now......."

I could barely see due to the tears of grief and rage that were forming in my eyes......but I saw the look on her face......it was one of pure pain and fear......she was in shock......and her eyes were blank as she stared ahead, unaware of anything in the room...even me......and all at once, the rise and fall of her chest stopped......the beating of her heart ceased......and I found myself holding her, weeping.....unable to do anything for her. What happened next, came so fast that I can scarcely remember it as more than a dream, but apparently, the culprit was still in the house and had heard me come in. He came into the bathroom, holding the same instrument that he had beaten Alex with, still covered in her blood.......and the smell of sex clung to him. He stood there for a moment, chuckling to himself, and when I looked up, all i knew was that I felt something inside me, screaming for his blood.......and soon, the look of satisfaction on his face changed......and he was screaming......I remember a feeling of utter rage......the most potent hatred and anger I had ever felt.....what came next were mere flashes of memory.....his stomach ripped open as he screamed....the scent of excrement and blood as his innards fell from his body, and the gargling end to his screams as his throat was ripped out.....leaving a scoop of flesh wholly gone from his throat, larger than two fists side by side.....then....darkness.

When next i came to, I was no longer in my house. I was in a dimly lit cabin, and there were three people around me, as if waiting for me to wake. The first that i noticed, was a woman, appearing to be in her mid to late 40's, dabbing the sweat from my brow with a cloth....the other, a man with dark hair, watching me with a look of sadness on his face, and the third......was my mother. She had the stain of tears on her face and had been crying it seemed for some time....but when i awoke, she came to my side.......

"Kaidan......do not be alarmed......you are safe here. A lot has happened, and not all of which was unexpected. There is so much that is to be explained to you my son, so much that until now, I could not speak of. I am sorry to hear about Alexandria....I truly am, but you must not hold hatred in your heart."

She turned to look at the dark haired man with the deep, blue eyes.......then turned to look to me again.......

"You are going to hav e to leave with this man.....he will tell you all that you need to know, and show you what you must see. I know you have many questions, but now is not the time. You have a new life awaiting you.....and you are going to do great things......just remember that I love you, and I will always be here for you........"

I was confused, but I did not have the energy, nor the will to question anything I was told.

------------

I am going to have to stop there for now......as the hour is growing late. Perhaps another time, I will continue my tale in this journal. I have things to attend to on the morrow, and the dredging up of these memories is enough to heavy my heart and open old wounds........perhaps next time, i will continue with the rest of this story, and eventually, i will write of my Rite of passage......and maybe, the rest of my Tribe can remember me for what I have done when my time has passed.....


- Kaidan Weaver-of-Dreams -

A past revealed

Memories....

They seem so fluid, so unpredictable....so.....elusive...and yet, when they flood one's mind, it is like a great see that is ever expanding.

With my recent trip back to my home, they seemed to return almost as quick as my power. However, I did not ha ve time to comb through them and reflect upon my life. We had all been tasked with removing Azonin from the tower of the White Owls. With Freyla's disappearance, I had to rely on my own judgement and intuition when dealing with those that I once called brothers.

Crossing through th portal into the tower, I was assaulted by the power of the ring......feeling it's essence so near, and radiating so much power was almost like drowning. I knew that the corruption had spread through my former comrades and the taint of that evil flooded this place. It was evident what had happened though once we arrived. The fools now wore the robes of Tiamat's followers, and that alone was enough to push Kharask to action, as well as Merric. I myself was out for blood.....they stole my life from me, and I wanted to return the favor.....yet, maintaining control was a priority. I needed to remember exactly why we were here.....and thankfully, even when faced with the summoned elementals and powerful magic wielding fools, I maintained some semblance of control, yet even still....I found myself putting more effort than necessary into my spells.......it was inevitable.

As we made our way deeper, I remembered more of what had happened, and while it is true that I was distracted, I still found that my spells were never missing my enemies.....I could not afford to allow them to hinder our movement. When we reached the vault, we found more of the fallen ones standing in our path, and I had no choice but to show them exactly what it was that they feared in the beginning......I had worn the ring before....and it had shaped my magic into what it was now.....powerful, consuming, and frightening. The ring had imprinted a small bit of madness into my mind, but not the madness that consumes.....the madness that can be directed into the minds of others. They proved no match for us.......between my mental manipulation and icy resolve, Ehrentaelic's swordcraft, and Kharasks ever commanding presence they were decimated. Of course, Azriel seemed to relish the battle, almost as if he himself was taking his own revenge....and Merric, well merric is always lethal in combat, as he is overlooked because of his size.......

When we finally entered the vault, there it sat......as it always had. The guardians of the vault recognized me.....moving to stop our advance and as they did, they revealed their nature. There were two Basilisk's, and a Naga....all vile creatures that have as many tricks as they do deadly attacks. We dispatched them with some effort and after they were dealt with, we moved to the ring. It was calling me.....it knew me and knew my power could compliment it's own. Azonin was indeed tempting...and as I felt it's call, my mind was nudged.....yet I had been so conditioned to the powers of the ring that I managed to fight it off....however, not without some effort of will. Had I put that ring on, I'm not sure what would have happened........but if Azriel thinks that he would have been enough to take me out after putting the ring on, he was mistaken. I knew his position, and I know what he had planned on doing.....perhaps he still held on to a certain measure of contempt for me and saw it as a chance to end me for my past deeds....whatever the reason, he would have failed.

I say these things not out of arrogance, nor out of any sort of contempt for my comrades, but merely out of knowledge of what Azonin was capable of. Kharask quickly moved to take the ring....and i saw him falter for a moment.....knowing what it was showing him......the same things it had once showed me. It showed him power.....perfection.......the pinnacle of what he could be. It showed him what he needed to see to put it on. Thankfully, he did not......else he would have gone against everything he believed....everything he stood for.

Leaving the tower, we were instructed that it would be in our best interest to leave.....but we were thanked and rewarded for our help in the matter. I drew a portal to my tower...which was formerly Zolnic's....and I could see the uneasiness in the others at being in this place. Good. That meant i would be relatively secluded when here so that i could devote myself to my studies. We rested there for the night and I took that opportunity to reflect on my returned memories.....as well as speak with freyla. She had disappeared when we first got to greystar, and I was intrigued to see her appearance had changed. Much like myself, when we went into Greystar, she was incomplete, and after our trip, she had been restored to her former glory.

You all want the truth of the matter of my past? Let me tell you.....

I was a Junior professor for the White Owls, in charge of training pupils in the basics of wizardry.....and even going so far as teaching an introduction in planar magic. I had been introduced to Azonin at a young age, and that had started my interest in the artifact. I studied and strived for greatness, but could never commit to a set path. There was love in my life at this time....a young female mage named Neeala.....she was beautiful....articulate...intelligent and very gifted. She was much like myself, and that was what drew me to her.....and when she became pregnant, I found my purpose. I took initiative, and began my studies of Azonin....and my Master actually granted me access to the ring itself.....she set me on the path I am on now.....because when I entered the vault, the ring was there, ready for me...waiting.

When I put Azonin on, I saw what my true calling in the arcane was......my gifted mind could be used to influence others......and direct my own hint of madness into their minds. This did not happen until I put Azonin on however......so in part, what I have become, I owe to the ring.
I did not get to relish the power of the ring for long.....because no sooner did I put the ring on, I was confronted by the elders of the order, claiming that I did not have access to the vault.....and they came up with a charge, claiming that I was trying to syphon the power of the ring for my own purposes. This charge was false however.....and when I spoke out about it, i was brought to trial and banished from my home......but not before the elders used the ring to influence the Eladrin senate. I fought against the power of the ring when it was turned on me, and thankfully so....because I think had I not fought so hard against it's power, I would not be where I am now......

The last time I saw Neeala alive was as I was having my mind shattered by Azonin.....

I miss her......more than i can say.....and finding her dead within the tomb of Phaethon was hard.....but at least it was I who buried her.......it was I who performed the funeral rights.....a nd that is all I can ask now. As for my daughter, she is safe for now......I know that much. I know she is being looked after.....and I hold on to hope that one day, she will be able to know her father.....

I have a long road ahead of me.....mistakes to correct.....and above all, I have my current goals to see through. Tiamat is responsible for all that has happened in my life...even if indirectly.....and she will pay. I cannot allow her influence to spread as it has through my people, and that is why I am drawn to kharask. Hopefully, he can see that i am learning from my mistakes, and hopefully together, the Two Scars can end Tiamats influence in the world.....because if not, things will be far worse than anyone can imagine. I will do my part......I've even been sought out by one of my previous apprentices......and she seeks to continue her training. I will start there, guiding her through the arcane to the best of my abilities. Breena is young, inquisitive and very gifted.....and being that she is a Gnome, she will do fine with the powers of illusion. Because of her heritage, she has a natural affinity for that particular form of magic.....and I believe she will shape into a fine mage. For what I have planned, she will indeed need all of the tutelage i can give her......

Soon we depart for Narjhon.....and from there, Kharask wishes to set out into the desert to search for an artifact belonging to his people. I will aid him...as promised. He is going to need me...especially considering what we are facing.....I must rest now......these next days shall be trying and I shall need all of the preparation I can get.....

The return of the lost son......

Home.......

A word so many use, yet so few understand.

Should it surprise me that my body, though pained with being back home, is also renewed and refreshed as if emerging from a crystal clear spring in the early morning? When first we crossed the rift into the feywild, I was welcomed with memories and even renewed power. There is nothing more satisfying than feeling the power of magic heavy in the air and in everything around me......yet what is this sadness I feel? Something is amiss...and even though I have been gone for so long, I can still feel the subtle, foreign power coursing through the air....drawing me closer towards greystar and calling me as if wishing to see a son that has been lost but has now returned. I can feel the ring.....perhaps it is because of the failed attempt to manipulate my mind, or because I have known it's power since a young age.

We trekked on into the forest surrounding Greystar, sticking to the only path that the forest held.....and as we neared the city, we came across a group of wild fey.....which had demanded our magical equipment.....now, I know I speak for the others when i say that was not an option.....and yet, after dispatching the creatures, Kharask gives me glances that show his disapproval.....as if I was wrong. He knows nothing of this realm, nor of it's inhabitants....and still he acts as if his way is the only way.....the fool. While intelligent, he has no co mmon sense....and it shows. If he thinks every creature in the realms is going to rally to his cause, he is an idiot......and I say that with the utmost respect.

The others all view me as mad.....even after all of the time we have spent together, and yet, they turn to me for help constantly......I am tiring of the constant bickering....and the mistrust. Let them view me with suspicion....let them pass judgement, but when the time comes, they know that I am the one who will be there by their side. My purposes and goals are my own....much like theirs are their own....and yet, i am the only one constantly brought into question.

I could see it in their faces as we moved on, and I knew what they were thinking, however, what could i say? As we neared the gates, Azriel let us know, and we were met with a squad of Bladesingers.....all of whom were reluctant to deal with me.....of course, under the circumstances, I cannot say i am surprised. Ehrentaelik was seperated from us as we were led into the city, being put in confinement for the time being. After Kharask, merrik, azriel and i waited for a few moments, we were met by a man who turned out to be the Drow's mentor......

He informed us that the Order of White Owls has sealed itself off from the city, keeping all from the tower which seemed ominous compared to the rest of the structures in Greystar. My refusal to stay silent obviously infuriated the man, and I could tell that he held a measure of animosity towards me.....however, we came to an agreement of sorts....because as it turns out, my fellow Eladrin are starting to see the perils of dealing with the corrupt order of wizards to which I used to devote so much of myself......and it seems the only wizards left are the most poisoned of them.
I will not lie....when he told us that we were to enter the tower and eliminate the wizards who were spreading their tainted views through Greystar, i felt joy....and the rising of a familiar hate and rage......I am not sure that i can go through with this without losing myself, but i do not have a choice. I know best what we are up against, and I must lend my power to my companions, but the ring.....I hear it calling my name......I feel it in my blood.......even after all of this time, the temptation is still there. I overcame it once.......can I do it again? Or am I doomed to lose myself into oblivion and condemn my comrades to death?

Kharask worries about my connection to this ring.....he has never openly stated as much, but he does not have to. He is right to worry.....I myself am worried and I can only hope that when the time comes, I am strong enough to hold on to who I am rather than fall back into the person i was....I am trying....but it is not easy.....and if Kharask only knew how hard i fight to remain true to myself, he would understand.....but alas...this is not his conflict.....it is mine, and I must endure it alone. In three days time we move to storm the tower, and in three days time, we will see exactly where my heart lies....even now I cannot say.....I have never been one for unnecessary violence, but I have also never been in a position to exact revenge on someone who stole my life away from me. I could use Freyla's guidance right now, but she is nowhere to be seen....I am alone in this....and I feel as though I will be swallowed up.

There is one thing i do know.....when all of this is done, one way or another, my name will be spoken within my home again....and if Ehrentaelik's mentor is true to his word, he will stand for me to be welcomed back amongst my kindred.......but should he prove to be untrustworthy, he too will be yet one more obstacle in my path to being reunited with my people.......

I hope that I do not make the same mistakes as before.......it will prove to be my undoing should I fail at maintaining my composure......

Dalanor-A return to power

(This is an in depth look at Dalanor and some of the changes in appearance and attitude that he carries. It is not so much a character profile, as it is alook inside his mind.......)

I feel lost...................

The world I thought I knew is not as it once seemed. Everything was clear cut, and straight to the point.....and now, now it's an intermingled web of lies and deceit. My path has been made clear to me, and my power grows daily.....though I cannot say i am surprised. There are things from my past that have been made clear.....and I would be foolish to step onto the same path I once followed. I was young, full of hate......and quite.....arrogant. Look where that got me now.....I have a daughter, and yet I've never known her....I had a wife......and only held her again after her death.......I had friends....and they betrayed me. It's obvious that I must do everything in my power to make things right......my people are being led by the same deceitful, arrogant, dangerous people that set me up for a fall, and this is something I cannot allow to continue. Before, i cared for nothing but my magic......and that led to me destroying someone's life....someone who is still very close by......but now, I have something more to drive me......I have my daughter...and she is being taught by these same people who tried to shape me as their tool.

I will not stand by and allow her to be used as I have, nor will I allow the corruption of greystar continue......it may take time, but I will inevitably free my people of the utter wrongness that fills my home...even if I am no longer welcome amongst them....I will help them to see what I now do, and should they accept me back someday, that is fine, but even still....I am the one responsible for raising my daughter....I will be the one to teach her....and I will be damned if she refers to him as father.......

Kharask has allowed his own personal goal to cloud his judgement....and cares not for anyone elses cause, yet expects all others to follow his.....he has a new advisor.....Vershulk.....and he specializes in a dark, twisted form of magic....in fact...it is not even magic....using the mind to direct psychic power at an enemy in twisted ways far different from my own methods.....my methods are subtle and simply nudge.....his methods speak of complete control and twisting of anothers mind......I do not like it.....it is for this same type of power that the drow sacrificed their place within the feywild, and look where that got them. I fear that Vershulk is manipulating Kharask, and this in and of itself is disturbing. I do not know his motives, nor do I know his purpose.....but the fact remains that I do not trust him. Kharask grovels at this mans feet as if he were a god......let him.I was once the least sane member of this little group....and now? Now i am the only one who can see clearly. Everything ties together......from when we began to take contracts, to now.....it all revolves around what is to come....even my situation.....it is all tied together, but Kharask cannot see it. Maybe Ehrentaelik will....he seems to be the only one other than me who is able to see things as they are......

Merric is changed, and seems as if he is lost......he discovered his poeple, saved his father, and lost a friend.....with baerds death, everything seems different. He was the only close tie to the group that merric had.....and i feel for the young one. Azriel is another story.....noone knew about him before we wnt to the library.....before i saw my life. His mind was stolen from him....much like mine was, except....he did not overcome the effects.....and his life, at one time, was miserable.....mostly due to me. I used him...as a slave....treated him as though he were trash....and discarded him as if he were nothing......it is partly my fault that his life is in shambles, yet when I spoke to him, he was calm. I expect that a conversation will arise from our previous talk, and it may not be altogether pleasant. I know he will hold the past against me....I also know that he will never truly be able to forgive me, but hopefully, he can see past the way I was, and see how i am now....that is all I can hope for.....

Ehrentaelik? Well, he has something planned..... but I have come to trust him.....despite who he is and what he represents.....I actually view him as a friend...though he can be a bit moody, and very standoffish....I still would trust him with a great many things........however...the fact that he utilizes talents which are generally not known unless trained by an Eladrin......fascinates me. i expect that soon we will learn of his past...but for now, i must be content to wait.....

I suppose that when I first met these people that have now become almost something akin to family...albeit a messed up, dysfunctional family, I thought that they were merely 2 dimensional creatures with no drive....it's refreshing for once to see how wrong i was....about a lot of things.
I am not who i used to be, that much is clear...and I cannot ever allow myself to return to that way of thinking.....I am not some arrogant fool with no idea of how much I still had to learn......I know my limitations....I know what is required to gain more power.......experience and hard work.....and I know that my life is not the most important. There are things worth dying for and living for....there are people worth fighting for, and I intend to do my part. When all is said and done, I will not be remembered for being the strongest, the smartest, or even the most powerful....I will be remembered for helping to make a difference....

this is probably the coolest viseo ever

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zSgiXGELjbc

Session 1: Subject: Victor Ramsey

((This is a character post, detailing the alterations jacob will make to his mortal friend Vic using Dominat level three: The forgetful Mind))




(There is an audible click as the tape recorder begins recording)

I'm keeping this record of my alteration to Vic so that if I do need to subject him to another session, I know what I have already altered. He is my friend, but he is also becoming a liability...and rather than discard him like some piece of trash, I will try to help him break his addiction.....he helped me through college, now I return the favor......

Subject: Victor Ramsey

The subject has a severe addiction to cocaine and a chemical dependency to the same substance. I will attempt to rework his memories and alter his mind slightly so that he can break free of the addiction. The subject has been dominated already, and so it should make the process easier.

(There is the sound of someone shifting their body and it is apparent that Jacob has shifted to make eye contact)

Vic, I need you to listen carefully. After your recent brush with the law, after I picked you up from the police station, you had some measure of guilt about the situation. You told me that you wanted to check yourself in to a rehab center and commit yourself for 90 days. You asked if I would sign the paperwork for you, stating that you could not be released until you have completed the program. You can only be released after the 90 days is up, and you cannot check yourself out. Should you try, you will fall unconcious and remain so for at least an hour. Your rent and base utilitities will be covered by me, and your job will be waiting for you. I am granting you extended medical leave for the duration. Should you so much as indulge after you are released, you will come to me and tell me face to face.

Now, vic, you will return home now and upon returning home, you will pack your things and head to the rehab center. You will find that they are expecting you, and your paperwork has been filled out......

(There is a few moments of silence, and you hear the sound of a door opening and closing.....)

The session seemed successful, but we will see how things turn out. I will follow up after the 90 days is up.

(The recording stops)

Jacob Halloway : Lord of fools

(This is my first character post with Jacob. I had a hard time with putting his personality into writing, but I think I have it down.......)

When Randolph first embraced me, I was excited at the idea of the power I would posess. I was manipulative....and still am in a way. The problem is, I see now what this all is.....it's a game of chess, and right now, I am merely a Pawn. That is not enough for me...nor has it ever been and anyone who knows me will tell you the same.

From what I understand, members of the Ventrue clan gravitate to Invictus and it's old world customs, but me? I'm a businessman and I see no future with a group of egotistical bastards who like to stand above the rest of us and watch as we desperately try to rise above what is expected. I saw opportunity with Gabrielle and her movement partly due to her capability as a leader, and in part because the Shatter-proof glass ceiling that so-called first estate keeps above the younger kindred does not exist. I'm not saying that I yearn for Gabrielle's status or position, but I am not content with staying at the bottom. I've shown that in my mortal life, so why is it so far fetched for me to seek the same opportunity in my Requiem?

My coterie may mock me and think as little of me as they wish, but no ne of them has any sense...well, Crawford does, but he is rash and not just rough around the edges, but he is more serated, like a hack-saw and always suspicious of our motives. I suppose that comes from being a detective all of those years and to his credit, he is a good man....he is just......socially impaired. He thinks me a fool, that much is certain, but if he thinks he has me figured out, he has another thing coming. He doesn't like to listen to reason, and my reputation is just as much at risk as his....so with that said, the coterie is in need of new management. I will not sit by and let him succumb to his beast and become a threat physically, or even by association. That's all I need...is for him to lose who he is to his beast and become a dmaned revenant. I'm going to have to take a subtle approach with him....he's doesn't respond well to the up front approach......

As for the others, A.J. is a little too quick to draw his gun and fire off like a gunslinger of the wild west. I think he fancies himself a cowboy, and I don't fault him for it....some of us just never outgrow boyhood fantasies. He has potential though.....if I had his talent for inspiration....I would sure as hell use that talent to the best of my ability. However, he prefers to be up close and personal.....he can throw a punch, I'll give him that, but in our world, what fucking good is a rough and rowdy, gun waving redneck? None. He could go places if he would just pull his head out of his ass and be himself instead of acting foolish and trying to impress Crawford by being an ass to others. I suppose the correct term for someone like him is cockalorum......what can I say? the fool gets under my skin.....perhaps one day...he will lock gazes with me...and that will be when....nevermind....I'm getting ahead of myself.....

What can I say about Lisa? She's got her uses, and in all honesty, she has been an asset.....however, she constantly talks about how we shouldn't kill and how we should try and see the big picture, but in my opinion, she is the one who fails to see the big picture. She holds on to this idea that she is going to make us better people.....that's her failing. We are no longer people...we are inhuman creatures that pass as people....we feed from people....and we manipulate them for our own gains. The sooner she realizes this and comes to terms with her situation, the better off we will be.

I may not be perfect, but I am far more open minded than my companions. This existence is who we are now, but that does not mean we have to follow what is expected. Gabrielle and Randolph both seem to believe that there is potential within me...obviously, otherwise I would be no more than a human Consultant for a marketing company. I am still getting used to the way things are now, but I'm working at it. As for my future? I have plans....and while they may not take me to the top, they will still get me close enough to have real influence, and should anyone stand in my way...they will see why I was chosen.....they will know the extent of my mind...in more ways than one.

That reminds me...I should speak with Randolph and Gabrielle together sometime soon........I get the feeling that they are not telling me something.......

James Kevin Austin

This may be my blog for posting character stories and gaming updates, but today, I am using it to write about a man that was very important to me. He was a friend, a good man, and more importantly, he was my father.

On january 21st, 1995, I was 7 years old. I had only the week before, returned home to my mother's house after spending christmas break with my father. My parents were divorced and my father lived in North Carolina, having only just moved down there 3 months earlier. He had landed a good job and was working hard to establish a new beginning, hoping to move me down there to live with him. Everything was set and my mother and he had co me to an agreement, and even gone to court over the matter. I was excited about the idea of living with my dad and being down there closer to my uncle and cousins, my stuff was mostly packed and i was waiting for him to call my mother and say that everything was set for the move.....however, it was not to be.....because on the day of january 21st 1995, my father died in a horrible car accident on the way home from work. Even at the age of 7, i was smarter than most my age and understood the fact that he was gone from this earth. I blamed my mother for his death, wishing it had been her....and to this day, I still have a part of me that wishes she had been the one to go and not him.
I lost more than my father....I lost my friend, I lost the one person I was supposed to learn from...the one person who was supposed to guide me through my teenage years....the one who was supposed to protect me. I lost the man who was supposed to teach me how to be a man. Even now, 14 years later, I feel a deep, agonizing pain and there is a pla ce in my life that could never be filled. All I can do now is do my best in life and hope that he would be proud of the person i am today. Day in and day out though, I find myself waking with a deep sadness, and I suffer from depression which is something very few know. I am not as happy and carefree as I seem.....I cover my constant pain each day with a smile and a lot of jokes....but that is no more than a wall that I hide behind. I know this is not the most cheerful post I have ever made, and I appologize. I needed an outlet, and this is the only way I can achieve that. Writing helps, but im not the type of person to open up for a conversation about this.

To all of you who still have their fathers, I envy you. Cherish every moment you have left, and please, don't let fights go unresolved, because trust me, you regret it.

So, as I sit here and crack this beer, I will smile and say...

"Here's to you dad...."

Thank you for reading this.......


Matthew James Kevin Austin

(Yes, I have two middle names.....what of it? lol)

A reflection of one's past....

After what had been revealed to Dalanor in the library, his mind had been reeling, and he had taken to meditation to calm and center himself. He could see who he was, and who he had been....but who he had been still seemed so alien to him. Though he was the same person, he had found that who he was now was so different from who he had been. The natural affinity for the arcane was still there, and the love of knowledge was still there, but his very nature was changed...as though he were now purer and more reserved. He still could not see how he could have been so arrogant, so brash and so......cruel, while at the same time, being a good man.....it was too much to handle.

He decided that his actions now were what was important, and if he ever did truly recover all of his memories, he would remain as he was now. That being said, what of the revelation of his true calling? A Planeshifter? That was a high station, even amongst wizards......and if he set on this path, he would be of a select few who were able to freely travel between the planes, studying the finer details of the astral sea, or even visiting the abyss and recording data from that plane.....it was exciting.....however, what would become of him then? Would it be enough to regain favorable status amo ngst his people? Would he ever be able to step foot into Greystar again? Or would he have to involve himself with the Summer court of the Fey to regain his good name? He knew that doing so may require a hefty price, but he would do anything to return to his life.....he sought to teach and influence the younger generation of wizards in the proper practices and proper actions of being a wizard which he felt that The Order of the White Owls did not properly do.

Moreover, would he ever be able to know his daughter? Would she accept him? Would she shun him? Or would she already be too far under the control of The Order for him to save? In his heart of hearts, he knew that it would be a hard road ahead, and he knew Kharask would support him, but would he allow Dalanor to utilize the company's contacts to learn more of his daughter? Would he force Dalanor to choose between his daughter and the company? he doubted it, but if need be, the wizard would strike out on his own and take on the Gods themselves to be with his daughter and make up for lost time.......

That time would come soon enough......the time for choices.....but one thing was certain.....he would see all paths through to the end.......he had a commitment to the Two Scars, he an obligation to see to the safety of the realms, and he had a strong desire to know what having a family felt like. Muttering an oath to Correlon, he let loose a bit of his will, binding himself to the paths ahead of him......

"I know you and I have had our differences, but I make this oath to you Correlon......by my power, I swear to you that I will see my duties through till the end. I will see the terrible plans of Tiamat thwarted and lend what power I can to the cause, but know this, I will return to my home, and I will reclaim all that was lost to me.......though I was young, and arrogant, it appears as though i was correct so long ago....... That power has never come against the likes of me, and i will break free from it's hold.....with or without your help, but kinow this Correlon, I hold no grudge against you, for this was not your doing.....it was partly my own. I accept the responsibility i must take for what has happened in my life, and I thank you for the small grace of letting me keep my magic....but I ask only one thi ng of you....keep my daughter safe....keep her from those who would use her, and if it is too late, give her a fighting chance......not as a request, but as a favor, in which you can call on me to return at any time......."

Dalanor felt a tear slide down his cheek, and he hoped that the Patron Deity of Magic and art would hear his oath and prayer.....he hoped that he would have the strength to make it through the ordeals that faced him.........

"Neeala....I am sorry for all that has happened.....I only pray that you can forgive me for all that has happened...

After all was said and done, Freyla appeared, perching on his shoulder......

"Dalanor, you should tread carefully with what you learned.....there could be a hidden motive behind these visions you saw......"

Dalanor sighed......

"And you are foolish for a Spirit Owl......I know what I saw was the truth of things.....for each vision triggered memories and I saw thi ngs from two perspectives in each visio ns....from a first person perspective, and as an observer...at the same time. Do not question my intelligence.....I am not the young fool i once was....."

He was obviously emotional and it was quite unlike him......

"Dalanor....I'm sorry, I just think you should be careful of what you have seen.......some of it could be mistruth. No Eladrin has ever shaken the effects of the banishing....not one."

Dalanor swatted her away....

"It seems that there is a first time for everything......I am not some simpleton. My training delved into psychic manipulation, and as such, I believe I was cushioned from the effects.......now leave me be.....I wish to be alone for now. I am sorry if I seem rude, but I just need time to reflect........"

With that, Freyla left, and Dalanor returned to his meditation.........

A past revealed......

The perilous trek through the treacherous library corridors had finally paid off....the adventurers stood amidst a massive domed room that looked undisturbed and in outstanding condition for the age of the place. The group was instructed by the spiritual library guides to stand before each of the mirrors that were within this room. It seemed odd to Dalanor but it turned out to be exactly what he had been searching for.........

When he gazed upon the mirror, memories started flowing back from his childhood, from his training, even from the events leading up to and surrounding his exile. It was as if someone had let loose a flood gate of information, and even spells that he had known were returning to him. He saw the arrogance of his youth....something that left him somewhat regretful....he saw behavior and actions that would leave him deeply troubled for a while to come, and he saw Neeala.....

His suspicions about her had been correct.....there had definitely been something there....a nd he knew it when he laid eyes on her body in the tomb of phaethon. Everything he had suspected, even become curious about had been proven true......they had been in love.....and she had been forced to watch what they did to him during his trial. The most shocking revelation was that he had been an expecting father when they took his life from him. Neeala was dead , no longer would her beauty, nor her brilliant mind be there for him....no longer would he be able to hold her.....they had taken that from him too.....and while his thoughts strayed to vengeance and anger.....he snapped back into focus......he was far beyond this petty notion that mortals had of revenge, but that did not make the pain any less.

Dalanor let his thoughts trail back to the fact that he was a father, and that his daughter was still alive....and that was when the mirror showed him her face......she looked so much like him.....it was uncanny.

Once everyone had finished with their own visions, the group had departed the place, returning to Kharan Has with haste, all the while, noone speaking.....all of them just mulling over what had happened. Upon reaching kharan Has, Dalanor made his way to Vadriar's shop, and for the first time, he allowed himself to show emotion. He sat within the lab, his head in his hands and he wept.......partly because of grief, partly out of anger, and some out of joy......though he was Eladrin, and a wizard at that, he was still a being that experienced emotion and felt pain as any other creature.....

At some point, Dalanor regathered himself and finally calmed himself. he felt better, but he also knew what he had to do. His daughter had noone, and that alone frightened him. He would have to speak with Brennavon again and have the man check on her.....and also see if he could arrange for a meeti ng with his daughter....if it was not possible, Dalanor would fight to reclaim his name among his people, and he would be there for his daughter.....he would be da mned if she would be twisted and used in the way that he had been........but he would do so with kharask's help and guidance, because things had changed, and Dalanor among them.......he had a true reason to keep going forward...he had a purpose now, and that was all that mattered........

"I swear to you Neeala, I will see that our daughter is safe...even if I should give my life....I will see to it that she does not befall the same fate as either of us......"

Dalanor's Thoughts

This is just a character post to give you some insight into Dalanor's views of his comrades

Dalanor himself, while very ambitious, and very driven, is also a good man at heart. He has allowed what happened to him in his past to change hi m and shape him into something colder, yet when one plays to his good natured side, he cannot turn away a request for help.....and many do not grasp this.....for he feels that he would be viewed as foolish and weak. However, there are a select few who he has gotten to know and he has begun to return to his true nature...slowly.....yet surely....

Baerd- Dalanor views the dwarf as a gruff, rash, sometimes impulsive man.....and yet, he senses a great pain within the dwarf. Dalanor doesn't truly know what to make of him at times, but Baerd has always proven himself as a capable ally. The dwarf, while not the most.....charming of the group, is still a friend and Dalanor trusts him at least to a certain degree....for he thi nks beard to be a walking time bomb....

Merric- Dalanor has an understanding of Merric that has come merely from observation. The Halfling, while trustworthy (So far) employs questionable methods to achieve his goals. Dalanor suspects that it was out of necessity for his own survival that Merric took the path that he did, and he suspects a certain code of ethics and morals that the halfling follows, though they may be of his own making.....

Azriel- Dalanor dislikes Azriel personally.....and not because of any wrong done, but merely because of the Wood elf's attitude. In some instances, Azriel can be worse than most Eladrin and that in itself is infuriating.....how can one such as he hope to ever be better than an Eladrin? Dalanor's views of the wood elf are biased, but he still trusts azriel, regardless of his nature....(though he would never tell azriel that)

Ehrentaelik- The Drow is an enigma to Dalanor. Knowing what he knows of the Drow and their ties to Lolth, he does not understand why the odd practitioner has not yet tried to kill him. The drow has saved Dalanor's neck many times, and has even proven himself as a worthy ally...perhaps that is why there is some trust in the man, but Dalanor is no fool and awaits the day when Ehrentaelik steps out of line......

Kharask- Kharask is the only member of the group that Dalanor trusts fully and completely. He knows what drives the Dragonborn...Honor, Pride, Justice.....and he knows that Kharask is truly a good man. The good nature of Kharask is actually beginning to influence Dalanor in ways that will only be more apparent as times goes on.....perhaps for the better?

here you go....

Something for all the doubters that Chuck Norris has an equal

http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i308/demise322/cyborgpirateninjajesus.jpg

I was had.......

hahahaha....awesome though i hate when shit like this happens.....follow the link and you'll understand....though i know chris and phil will be dancing nude to this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zfTo8_qABb4&eurl=http%3A%2F%2Fwww%2Etoplessrobot%2Ecom%2F&feature=player_embedded

A familiar endeavor

Memories......the very substance of memories was one that varied with each individual, but for one of the intellectual, one of the wise.....a magi, memories were a necessity. They allowed a wizard to access vaults of knowledge that are locked away in their every hungry minds, however, for Dalanor, they seemed to be a cause for intense headaches that sometimes left him begging for relief. This was caused by his situation. When he had been exiled from Greystar, he had been stripped magically of his memories, and the effect it had on him was something akin to a burning desire to reclaim what was lost. However, what had been thought impossible was occuring now....his memories were returning to him periodically and the strain of his mind struggling against the spells that had been performed in the process of stripping his memories left him with intense headaches.

One of the memories that had returned to him recently was a way for him to return to the feywild.....a ritual that all Eladrin could perform as easily and efficiently as the simple act of channeling the magic around them. This ritual had also been stripped from him, leaving him unable to see his home in any way and without a way to enjoy the immense beauty of the feywild. However, now, with that specific ritual in his grasp once more, he had decided it was time to return to the feywild....if only to see it's beauty once more. The problem was that he did not wish to disturb kharask....being that the Arkhosian was keeping watch of their charge for their current contract. Thus, exiting his room at the inn was going to be a problem....unless he tapped into his magic to do so.....and with a thought, he disappeared with a dull, quiet pop, reappearing for an instant at the top of the stairs, but instantly, he was gone again as if he had never been there. When he reappeared outside of the inn, he sighed with relief. He knew Kharask would have tried to stop him from leaving in the night, and so he had wanted to leave without him knowing.

"Sometimes, just being a part of this group is more trouble than it's worth......."

Dalanor shook his head, straightening his robes, and made his way just outside of the town. He was surveying for magical auras and conflicting energies, searching for a place that tied to the feywild, even if it were only a temporary point....and after about 20 minutes, he found what he was looking for...a spot where the magical energies converged, creating an ideal waypoint for the ritual in question. He took the time to prepare, building his will and allowing it to flow through him as if he were a conductor, and after a few moments, he was ready. Focusing on the point of energy in the area, he began to channel his will into the area, little by little until he found himself pulled away, only to find himself standing amidst a lush forest of a truly Vibrant green color that took his eyes a moment to adjust to. Not only was everything more vibrant, but he felt a deeply vast expanse of magical energy all around him that actually brought him to one knee for a moment before his senses adjusted.

He stood, looking around with a small smile on his face, feeling a bit of a weight lift from his shoulders now that he could return home, if only for a while, and even if he was not welcome within Greystar.....

"Ah, a young wizard of the Eladrin.....you are a fair distance from Greystar young one...."

Dalanor started, his hand going to his wand almost instantly.......

"Come now, there is no need for you to jump to a defensive posture, nor will you need to turn to your mediocre grasp on the fabric of the arcane."

Dalanor felt a slight burning on his upper left arm, and through his robes, the mark that labeled him an outcast from his home glowed brightly, as if it were a part of the robes.

"Ah, you are *orar....(elven for outcast) I see now."

With a fluttering of wings, a strange white owl with flecks of silver in it's feathers and silver tipped wings perched on alow branch in front of Dalanor. The Eladrin replaced his wand in the leather loop that hung from his belt........and ran his fingers through his hair, calming himself.

"Ah a Mosor Orn (elven for spirit owl). Interesting....what is it you want of me? I am only here to see the beauty of this place....to remind myself of what it is I strive to return to......"

The owl cocked it's head to the side, as if studying the wizard.......

"You are lost, unknowing....and yet, there is a part of you that seems to be in conflict.....yes....you doubt yourself and your every action. It is all there in your eyes young wizard....perhaps I can offer you my guidance. You are very much in need of a companion to which you can turn to and confide in. I see potential in you, however, it will never be reached so long as you doubt. I offer you this...I will bond to you, offering you my wisdom and insight, and also, my eyes......however, in turn, you will allow me to accompany you to further explore and gain knowledge. There is much that will satisfy my intellectual thirst for knowledge in the material realm.....do you accept?"

Dalanor took everything that the creature was saying, listening intently. His better judgement told him not to enter a pact with a fey creature, and yet, he could discern no deception from this being........

"I accept, however, only on one condition......your name. You must tell me your name......"

The owl cooed gently....

"My name is Thaelae Molaesol (elven for Frela Silverwing) however, for simplicity purposes, you may call me Frela. I shall return with you wizard, but I want to observe you in the material plane, and so, for 24 hours, you will not see me.....I will follow, but remain distant...and if you have comrades, I wish to see your relationship to them as well....."

Dalanor nodded, his eyes alight, and yet, a hint of worry there.....how would he explain Er'entaelik? That was sure to cause an issue........

"That is understandable. My time remaining here is short....the passage I used was only temporary and I know not when it will close......If we are to leave, we must leave now......"

Frela perched herself on his shoulder and dalanor repeated the process he had used before, and he and frela were drawn back to the material realm, near where he had entered the rift. However, Frela took off in a fluttering of wings. Dalanor shook his head as he made his way back to the inn, and as before, he feystepped back to his room, a smile on his face. He was sure that this was a sign that he was on the right track to regaining his memories.......
If nothing else, he had at least acquired a new contact, and a valuable one at that.....she could be his eyes and ears.....he could utilize her i n many different ways to acquire information and to better make informed decisions.....

"Interesting day......."

With that, Dalanor entered his trance to rest his mind and body and reflect upon the events of the past few days........


((Not my best post....I have been finding it hard to write creatively lately, but it may just be due to the fact that I haven't blogged in a while.....another post to come soon......))

The new class.....

So in last nights session, we were down one member of the group, so we ran a playtest of our characters in a series of encounters. Let me just say, i love the way the warden feels as a character class. It's up front and very different from a wizard but it's a comfortable class to play as.....especially paired with the goliath race. I think the alt party is going to be unique from our mains due to the sheer amount of support abilities due to our two leaders. With the striking power of the avenger backed by the sorcerer and with my slides as a warden, we have so ma ny ways to manipulate the situation to better benefit our controller. This is going to be a different experience....... our mains have their own feel and unique tactics, which makes the whole situation more appealing. It shows our flexibility as well as gives a chance to have another perspective on the events unfolding in the campaign.

In general, i think i will have fun ru nning my warden and getting into the character. Now, I can't wait to face a dragon with the alts....just to see how they would handle it........a red would be nice, but who knows what our dm has in store for us..........

The alternate Identity....a Goliath Warden

Let me just start out by saying, I absolutely love this idea......I truly look forward to it, because a little diversity between characters keeps my ideas coming, and better allows me to improve upon my roleplaying. There is always a room for improvement on my part, and I think this is a perfect way to do that.

Now, on to the reason for this particular post......tonights gaming session revealed to us the chance to use alternate characters aside from our mains. For my alternate character, I opted for a change of pace alltogether....I chose to go with a primal defender(the Warden) that belongs to one of the new races. I am choosing a Goliath for this, hoping to represent Dalanor's opposite.....an upfront character relying on brute force and primal energy....in essence a wild, unpredictable type that views the world with a personal set of morals.......whereas Dalanor is a calm, calculating conflicted wizard who relies on a calm, focused mind.

Goram Stonecrusher

Goram hopes to become a champion to his tribe, and in order to prove himself worthy, His tribal elder sent him from his home, telling him that he was not to return until he could truly Harness the might of the Ancestor spirits....and show a willingness to give of himself for others.....if he could accomplish this, he may return and stand as the Champion of his tribe, and thus, earning the privilege of representing his Tribe amongst the rest of the world, in dealings with other tribes and even races, speaking for his tribe on a great many things......

It's a brief, simple background for now, but i need to mix it up a bit so it's not so bland and whatnot. I will post another post on Goram later, with a better detailed background, so he actually feels like a character...I just wanted to post the basis for him.....

Trial and error

(Ok all, I'm going to be posting a character post, though it is not relating to this weeks session...that will come later.....))

After Dalanor's attempt at Planar magic, he had taken to his books, studying to see what he had done wrong. He sat at his workstation, shuffling through his notes and tomes, when Arilo made his presence known.

"Dalanor, you really should take a break. You've been here for hours, and I'm quite sure you need at least some nourishment......"

Dalanor sighed, running his hands through his hair as he leaned back in his chair. It was true that he was hungry, and only now did he realize it....

"I suppose you are right my friend, I am quite hungry, and I am not making any headway....maybe I should take a break and look at the data with fresh eyes....."

Arilo jumped up into Dalanor's lap, purring softly......

"You see? You would be lost without me..... face it, I'm the brains in our friendship......"

Dalanor chuckled softly, scratching the orange furred feline behind his ears....

"I suppose you are right....."

With that, he ushered the cat off of his lap and stood, stretching as he did so......and he moved towards the door of his lab.

"I'm heading to the dining hall. I'll bring you back a little something....."

Arilo sat, looking at the Eladrin with an amused expression.....

"I can fend for myself....there are plenty of sources for my food....."

Dalanor nodded, and opened the door to his lab, and almost walked right into Neeala, who had been on her way through the corridor.......

"Well, I appologize Neeala, I should probably pay closer attention to my surroundings...."

Neeala only smiled.....

"Theres always an excuse for you being clumsy, eh? But don't worry about it...I was just on the way to the dining hall. Care to join me?"

Dalanor nodded.

"I was just headed there myself. I would welcome the company."

He walked beside her, his robes a snowy white, bearing a mark on the back, the mark he claimed as his wizards mark. Her robes were similar, however, hers were a little more elegant, and she bore no mark on the robes. As they walked, he asked about her studies.......

"How have your studies been going?"

She sighed for a moment, her eyes showing a slight frustration......

"I have the grasp of the new spells I am studying, however, it seems as though I am doing something wrong......."

Dalanor nodded, understanding her frustrations......

"I ran into the same problem......I just can't see where my errors were. What is it you are working on if you don't mind my asking?"

Neeala looked at him, a quizzical look on her face......

"The great Dalanor, actually interested in another's work? This is something for the history books....."

Dalanor shook his head.....

"Haha...funny....I was wondering because maybe we could be of help to each other......"

Neeala regarded him a moment as the made it to the Dining hall, each of them finding something to eat. After they each took a seat, Neeala spoke.....

"I am working on Illusory Magic, and it's practical uses in combat and every day life......"

Dalanor looked at her with a surprised look.....

"That is interesting. Illusory magic is quite potent and very draining. It takes immense will power and a high concentration, but it can be most effective.....I dabbled in the art for a while. The thing to remember is you must rely on your chosen implement as a focus for such spells."

Neeala sighed....

"I haven't truly decided upon the i mplement I wish to use......and eve n if I had, i would wish it to be truly mine. I would have to make it myself. A staff is too cumbersome, and an orb is much too....inappropriate for my style....and a wand, well, I would need to find the right material for such an implement.......but I have no talent with crafting magical items......"

Dalanor smiled.....

"That, my dear friend is where I can help you......"

After a long conversation, they headed back towards Dalanor's lab, and when they entered, Arilo was laying in Dalanor's chair......

"Well, I see you did indeed bring me a little something.....to what do I owe this treat?"

Dalanor glared at the cat, responding with a snap of his fingers. Upon the snap, the tip of Arilo's tail flashed with a spark and the smell of singed hair filled the room for a moment......

"Ok....ok...fine. I'll behave, but I'm just sayin, she is quite entrancing....."

Arilo exited the room, and Dalanor turned to Neeala who stood with her hands on her hips.....

"I trust that you would not harm that poor creature......."

Dalanor shrugged....

"Only if he doesn't make sarcastic comments and act like an idiot...I swear, sometimes, he drives me up the wall...."

Neeala chuckled....

"Wow....so you...argue with your cat? I think you two deserve each other......."

Dalanor set his mind to readying a few components for the ritual he was to guide Neeala through. After everything was prepared, he stepped to the side, giving her room, and began coaching her through the process. She seemed to be picking it up rather quickly, and he was impressed. He honestly envied her slow, yet methodic pace and concentration......it was something he had been lacking...true focus. He had been trying to hurry through the process of his own spells, seeking to achieve the end without the delicate touch he should have had.

After about an hour, Neeala sighed and took a step back, holding a deep mahogany wand with glowing lines of power along the implements surface.

"Wow....that was much more difficult than I expected, but it was worth it......."

Dalanor smiled, glad to see the satisfaction of success on her face.....

"You did quite well. Now, you have the means to achieve your goals. And in return, I gained some insight as to what I was doing wrong. I hope the wand serves you well......"

Neeala nodded, and hugged him tightly...

"Thank you my friend. Once again, I owe you one. I need to return to my work, and I'm sure you do as well, but in all seriousness, thank you Dalanor......."

With that, she left, returning to her own lab to finish her work. Dalanor stood, thinking for a moment before returning to his own work......and at that moment, Arilo returned......

"I still do not see why you don't pursue her Dalanor, she would make a good bride......"

Dalanor shook his head.......sighing.....

"Because I cannot devote my attention to her and my work, and it would be unfair to both of us....she is a good friend and i would like to keep it that way......."

Arilo stretched and leapt into Dalanor's chair........

"Idiot........."

(Juat a little something for you guys....I was bored and thought i would post something at least while I mulled over this weeks session......leave your thoughts and input please....)

Ideas

I have no doubt that when the arcane powers book comes out in april that I will have Dalanor take a familiar. I have already introduced through my blog a Feline named Arilo, however he was from Dalanor's past.......my other option is an owl for reasons that fit my character.....but, the question is...would we be able to get through a session without making Clash of the Titans references? Or jokes for that matter? Granted, it would be funny at first.....but I don't know if a weekly 15 minute joke is a necessary evil........what do you guys think?

An unsettling glimpse of the past......

There are many things that Dalanor had expected when he entered the tomb that bore the mark of phaethon, but actually stumbling across a portion of his memory and someone he had both known and trusted? There was nothing to prepare him for that.
When Dalanor had entered that small room, he found himself thrust back in time to witness an exchange with an Eladrin woman named Neeala. This exchange came during the time just before the council was to pass judgement on him for his transgression.....and she had tried to comfort him, however there was nothing to be done for it.....Dalanor was a cautious, suspicious man, even before he had been cast from Greystar. As the events played out in his mind, he took note that even through her comforting words, Neeala also felt ill at ease about the actions of the council in regards to his trial, so, with this small portion of his memory returned, he felt even m ore questions arise.....especially in regards to the last thing he remembered her saying.....and that would be why he had felt the need to travel to Kharan Has. He at least now knew what he was looking for.....and how to get more of the answers he sought.....

Snapping back to the present, he found himself staring at the three corpses before him. One of the Eladrin wore a pendant fashioned into the shape of a great white owl, and he had decided to take it. The symbol was that of the Order of The White Owls, a council of powerful wizards within Greystar.....that was the only knowledge he had retained from his time in the feywild....that, and the fact that he had been a Junior member of the council.....and now, he was cast out. The pendant, though not his, was something that he recognized and it gave him comfort. He cared not if the Eladrin would be angered were he to be seen wearing it.....he merely needed the comfort. As the group turned to leave the room, he sighed, turning back to look at the body of Neeala speaking in elven......

"Ai shor vaeres, Ai vystori. Ai shor mi sai air sar o eisi vydaesia jhar sai vaer....."

("I will return, I promise. I will see to it that you are properly laid to rest.....")

He slowly approached her body, a saddened look upon his face.....

"Ai eidylyndroji thys aelaeseirol sar car cadaelaer.....nairisiaria, o shor thysoli ti. Ai por byr shal sai cali sai taer o eindral jhoji sor....riar Ai maes sai o, Shaelalal shor cali mysti aezalol sai pai, vaendrasaer os tia marer os jhas saesaes eistyl si Aeladol. Tae Tysaelyl kedi os mosor eil thysaelaes cyr o shorol cor aestali....."

("I appologize for everything that has happened.....hopefully, you will forgive me. I did not want to have to meet you again like this....but I swear to you, Brennavan will have some explaining to do, regardless of my status or lack thereof among the Eladrin. May Correlon guide your spirit and forever hold you within his embrace.....")

With those words, he turned to catch up with the others, seeing them waiting right outside of the door. He was certain that they had heard him, but he cared not.....he had no shame. He would be the one to perform her burial......and not only the rights, but he would physically dig her grave with his own hands........

((That is all I have for you this week, and as for the translations, there is a handy tool that I have hidden in my bookmarks list that you would all enjoy.....an elven translator....hehe. Enjoy.....especially you chris. Here it is........http://www.coveworld.net/eberron/aerenal_translator.html ))

Thoughts of a Dead Eladrin

Death. So complete. The finality of the word was one to strike fear into the hearts of mortals since the dawn of time. Dalanor was no different, except the death he sought to escape was not a true death...it was the alienation from his own people, including his family. With the new contract that the troupe had taken, Dalanor was reminded of the pain he felt and buried, the longing to see his home again, and the nagging lonliness that came from never being able to return. It was something he had tried to forget, but the mark on his flesh was always there to remind him of this fact, that and the fact that he had made a grievous mistake. This was all he knew, and nothing more, for his brethren had taken from him the very thing that drove him.....knowledge.

Like a ghost of his former self, he travelled with this groupe of people who had, at least, accepted him on some level......but was that truly enough? Could he in good conscience use these people to help him find out what happened to him? He wanted desperately to know, and it seemed to him that he may have to resort to alternative methods to gain the answers he seeks. The followers of Tiamat want information from him that he cannot give them, and yet, in going to them, he may gain information of his own. He was debating whether or not to allow them to capture him......if only to see what he could learn, but then, it would be up to him to escape, and he had his doubts. The followers of Tiamat were quite powerful, and he was only one wizard.....which left him in a bind. It was something he had to think on, but, he would get his answers one way or another......

"I will not be made a fool of......"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O4InEGJzOsQ

Ok...it has to be done.....

The means to an end....

After the ordeal within the hammerhold, Dalanor took note of a few things. First and foremost, the massive door that blocked off access to other levels of the hammerhold, and the disturbing idea of an entrance into the Underdark. There wasn't anything that the Eladrin feared aside from the Underdark. He knew that down there, he would encounter those that would kill him on sight, many if not all of the drow were included in that group.

That brought Ehrintaelic to mind. What was the drows purpose, and could he be fully trusted? Of course, Dalanor knew only what stories he had heard of the drow from his people, but he felt that there was more to what he was told, and he didn't know the details, so he felt that perhaps, the eladrin had some fault i n whate ver it was that transpired. Because of this, he was willing to judge the man from his actions, and not from stories of his people.

After dwelling on his thoughts for a while, he finally turned his attention back to the group. He took note of Baerd most of all when the dwarf had asked about the Kobold mage. He noted something in Baerds voice and demeanor that he decided to keep to himself. So, when the group decided to head out, he followed without saying much of anything.

After a few days travel, the reached Kharan Has where they all went their seperate ways for a time, except for Kharask and Dalanor. Each of the two had business with Vadriar, the alchemist with whom they had become acquinted. They both tended to their business with the alchemist, and after all was said and done, Dalanor was approached by Kharask about a company of adventurers he was founding called the Two Scars. Dalanor of course accepted the invitation to the company after revealing some things to the Dragonborn that he felt were important matters, and after a small conversation and an understanding, they parted ways.

Over the next two months, Dalanor stayed with Vadriar, helping the Alchemist around his shop, and i n return, Vadriar allowed him to stay with him, and even began teaching him the theories and procedures that surrounded alchemy, going over the finer points of the craft with Dalanor. It would take some time to learn, but Dalanor was a very adept student. He had a hunger for knowledge that was far surpassed many. The mage knew he would have to spend far more time with the alchemist to fully gain an understanding of the craft, but that would not be a problem.

((To be continued later....this is gonna be a two post....))

The frustrations of a great mind.....

Continuing through the Hammerhold, Dalanor kept pace with the group, feeling as though he were set apart from them. He felt useless and rather weak i n comparison to them, especially considering that the Drow was at least as skilled in the arcane as he. As they ventured farther into the keep, he found his sense of pride diminishing further with each encounter that they had with their enemies. He knew how he must seem to them, and he did not blame them for coming to such a conclusion because he felt as they viewed him.

There was an emptiness that he could not explain....not because of a lack of love or any such silly thing like that....but because he felt incomplete....like something of great importance had been stripped from him. And the way he tried to decipher what it was that was lost, was muttering and talking to himself.

The troupe cut it's way through the kobolds that blocked their path, eventually gaining a new comrade along the way. While intriguing, the halfling proved to be no more that a rogue.....his tactics betraying him with every encounter they faced. He would watch the young halfling, in hopes that the small one's skills would be useful for his purposes...but until that time, he would keep the majority of his focus on Erantaelik and try to find the answers he sought in regards to the Drow's past.

After a few more encounters with the kobolds and a chance encounter with the undead, they had reached a place of great importance to the dwarves. A small temple to Moradin was where the artifact that Baerd sought was supposed to be, but, to no great surprise, it had been removed. Dalanor, never one to pass up the blessing of a god, placed his wand on the alter, muttering a small prayer. He may have fallen from Correlon's grace, but he sought a chance at redemption from the deity, and now, he hoped that through Moradin, the god would hear him.

Nothing of note transpired at the altar, and the troupe left, searching the rest of the keep. Eventually, Dalanor and the others reached a bridge leading towards the mine shafts and they were greeted by a bluescaled Dragonborn, a group of pesky Kobolds, headed by a chieftain, and a kobold wildmage......a deadly, nasty little bugger.

The Wildmage proved to be a problem, but nevertheless, the group survived against the kobolds and the deagonborn, though not before Dalanor was dealt a serious wound. He blacked out as he fell to one knee, and suddenly, his mind was filled with a soft, almost distant voice.......

"Dalanor, you have come far and done much but just know, that up until now, you have not shown a willingness to redeem yourself. However, since you, in your heart, feel the need to reach out to Correlon, he has sent me, his messenger to inform you that in the coming days, you will face challenges to both your faith and spirit. He is watching, and should you prove yourself, you will return to his good graces and your true path will be revealed. I leave you now, for my time is short. In the coming days, you will be given your task to prove your worth.....Correlon wishes you well, and truly hopes to see your sincerity in your actions. I leave you now, and wish you well young mage."

With a startled look, Dalanor turned pale, having not expected any of what had just transpired. After all, he had turned from the god in anger...that much he knew, but for what reason, he could not remember. All that he knew, was that he had done something terrible and had been cast out of the feywild because of it, and now, only the mark of the forgotten remained. Through the mark, he had lost any knowledge of how to return to the feywild at will , and it seemed that his memories had been tampered with. With nothing left to turn to, he sought what was lost in hopes that answers may reveal a few details about what had happened. He felt as if something were wrong, but he knew not what. If Correlon was willing to let him prove himself, maybe the god of magic could help him recover his memories and allow him to return home to confront those that cast him out.

"In time, I will have what I seek....until then, I will remain vigilant...and perhaps put forth my all into my actions. Distractions will get me nowhere, and certainly they will not help me stay alive......I must speak with Kharask, and soon. As the leader of this......group....he should be made aware of what I know of my past, and thus, that I have not been giving my full effort. He needs to be made aware of the reasons behind my actions........"

He spoke to himself, as always...trying to work out his thoughts. His mind was a vault of knowledge, and the stray thoughts sometimes crept into his mind to disrupt his plans. He knew that once he was restored, he would be fine, but that still did not make life in the now any easier.......

"I pray that he does not judge me on my mistakes....and hopefully, he shall see my usefulness soon enough."

He could see the others ahead whilst the searched the bodies of their enemies for anything useful........perhaps he would wait until they reached Kharan Has before speaking with him. Of course, there was the matter of Vadriar's task.....it had been completed and the Dragonborn should know of this fact..........

"It's settled then......you'll speak to Kharask, and for the love of the gods....stop talking to yourself! You're crazy enough without it............."

He began looking through his spellbook, and with a smile, noted that a new spell had revealed itself. His spellbook was full of spells, but he could not read all of them. As he achieved new heights of wisdom and intellect, more opened up to him......and it appeared as if he had finally unlocked a rather interesting spell....something sure to be useful for sticky situations.....

"This is most fortunate...."

The beginning of his new beginning...

Heres somewhat of a hint for those of you impatient and antsy people.....ahem(Chris)Cough But he knows what to expect, so this is just a bit of reading material for him. Anyway, I hope you guys like it......


Dalanor sat within his study, reading the tomes and spellbooks he had borrowed from the great library of magical texts. In the weeks that he had been a member of the order, he had advanced to a level of power that he had not thought possible. His studies had led him to many texts and scrolls that dealt with planar magic and the creation of portals. The thought of such a thing excited him as he sought more power and knowledge........

"This is exactly what I will need.....Corellon has blessed me with this great opportunity."

He bowed his head momentarily, offering thanks to the deity before closing the texts and heading to the component storage room, gathering those components he would need for the spell he was to use. He was planning to summon a portal to another plane, for now only to see if it was within his ability. After he had acquired what he needed, he returned to his personal lab, preparing the items he would need to pull this off.........and just when he thought he was finished, he was interrupted by a small, yet familiar voice........

"Sage Demise, you are experimenting with planar magic.....it is dangerous and should be supervised....why do you insist on setting yourself apart from the others?"

Dalanor smiled and shook his head.

"Arilo, please.....it still unnerves me to hear a cat talk.....at least...in this way. Besides...how can you doubt me after all that you have seen?"

The small orange feline purred softly and spoke yet again......

"Even so, the others trust you and so must I.....I call you a friend....but nothing good can ever come from Planar magic....."

Dalanor sighed and moved towards the door, opening it.

"If you won't offer constructive criticism, and you are that worried, wait outside....."

Arilo made his way out the door, sighing as he did so.....

"Don't say I didn't warn you then......"

Dalanor closed the door behind him. He moved to his station, and began the incantation. After what seemed like an eternity, the churning and swirling of the magical energies began. The energies began to form into an oval shape.....appearing like a fluid surface in front of him. With a pop, the portal was fully formed, and he stared in awe at the accomplishement before him.

However, his excitement was short lived as a misshapen, fluidic appendage reached through from beyond the other sid e of the portal. Dalanor panicked as the creature manifested itself in this world, appearing to have the consistancy of water and appearing similar to an elemental spirit of the feywild.

With a sigh, Dalanor muttered a word.....and a small, ball of pure force erupted from his hand, exploding like an overfilled waterskin........and the creature was dispersed. Had it been a stronger entity, he would have been in trouble. With a wave of his hand, he collapsed the portal in on itself and smiled to himself. For all intents and purposes he had succeeded........

"Well, no more of that for a while...........perhaps I will speak with the others and ask their advice before I attempt that again....."

After a moment, Arilo made his way back into the room, chuckling........

"What did I tell you idiot?"